And 2 weeks later…..

I started writing this blog 2 weeks ago and never got round to finishing it so just going to add to it!!!

Well Official Application Form has been filled in and sent to the LA and our SW has made a date for our 1st HS which will be in just over 2 weeks time, so all moving along nicely on our 2nd adoption.

After my last post re Munch’s arm, doctor said it would just be bruised and painful, went for our hospital appointment the following week and were seen by the consultant only to be told that his arm was re-broken. We are very upset with the hospital, for 2 weeks he was in pain and unable to move his arm, we have wrote a letter of complaint to the hospital for what good it will do!!!

Things seem to have settled a little at school, on returning after half term Munch came home with a general letter for the whole of year 3 from the head of year, saying that by now they should have settled into Junior’s but there was a handful of children who hadn’t. These children would be getting a report card and one a week would be reporting to her!!!! Well to say that we were furious was an understatement, Munch’s teacher had said the, should have settled by now bit to use just before half term, so we were sure he would be getting one. I went in armed with all my attachment stuff and gave it to his teacher and asked her to read it, then asked her to point me in the direction of the head of year teacher, and just told her straight that Munch was not having one, what did she expect to achieve by giving a child who suffer’s from very low self esteem something that was going to draw attention to all his bad behaviour’s and then for him to have to go to her full of shame, and insisted that he was not having one. Turns out though that it was a very badly worded letter, it was nothing like a report card but more about encouraging good behaviours, Munch has been given a laminated card with 3 areas to work on, and every time he achieve’s one of these goals he receives a sticker, at the end of the week he takes it to the head of year for her to praise how well he has done and he receives a little prize. He likes working towards things like this so  know it will work well, also got called aside by the teacher at the end of last week but to say how well he had done and worked hard towards his goals, so fingers crossed we are making head way at school.

Now 2 weeks on, the goals are working really well, no being called aside, 2 teacher has made a point of praising how he is getting on to me, so things are looking up at school.

We have had my dad staying for a couple of day’s, he has never been anything but good to Munch, but for some reason Munch over the last couple of times of seeing him has gotten progressively worse with the way that he acts towards him. I have to say over the couple of day’s that he was here I was extremely ashamed of the way that Munch behaved towards him, he was down right rude, arrogant, plain nasty, he got into the blaming and saying that Grampy had punched and kicked him.

To start off with we tried the ignoring it as we had on previous visits pulled him up about it and we know with the way that Munch’s mind works to him this is getting a reaction, way hay, lets do it all some more. It didn’t work he just got ruder and nastier, until in the end I completely lost it and was very very un-therapeutic and shouted at him until I was hoarse, I told him how dare he treat my father like that, I actually told him that I was ashamed of the way that he had behaved, I was telling Grampy not to bother getting a Christmas present for him as he did not deserve it, well I actually saw remorse, had one very upset boy, who just kept repeating over and over again that he was going to try much harder, and harder he has tried, he was pleasant to Grampy in the morning before he left, he has been pleasant to us for the last few days!!!!! Beginning to think that this therapeutic parenting is not all its cracked up to be and maybe good old fashioned shouting is what it takes!

Well a week today we have our 1st HS, referee’s received there letters today and we got our Medical questionnaire’s yesterday so moving forward in our quest for no. 2.