Ouch, That Hurt.

This morning was a much better start to the day than yesterday, Munch came knocking on the door again asking when were we getting up, this needs to be nipped in the bud, so he will be being informed that there will be no TV on school mornings when he does it, I know his answer will be that it doesn’t matter, but a couple of mornings of having to sit at the kitchen table will soon have the desired effect.

Although Munch was lively this morning, the mood that he was in yesterday had definitely lifted thank goodness, as it used to be that type of mood that we knew would escalate into a full-blown, full on meltdown, it could go on for a few day’s before he would blow, so we must be doing something right to have averted it.

We had to defrost the car this morning for the 1st time this year, and having changed my car a couple of months ago to make it more affordable for me not to return to work, I have to say I really missed my heated windscreen that I had on my last few cars, still beggers can’t be choser’s!!!! We got to school early today, Munch lined up and one of the little girls in his class came and stood next to him and held his hand, he had the biggest smile, and so did I after feeling so sad yesterday morning about him never having a partner to walk in with.

We have Munch’s main Christmas prezzie off Santa but apart from a few bits and piece’s had not got a clue what to get him, so me and hubby took ourselves off to Smyths Toy’s Superstore as Munch always refers to it this afternoon, we now have a long list of things to go and get next week.

From there we went to pick up Munch from school, he came out armed with his school photo’s, and even if a say so myself, what a very handsome son I have, off to the car where as both me and daddy were there Munch had to sit in the back. here was a helium balloon in the back from Sunday, on the drive home he kept pushing the balloon into the front of the car making it difficult to see, he was asked to keep it in the back, again he did it, was told again to keep it in the back and if he did not we would stop and get out and walk, well Munch being Munch just had to push it that bit further and push it into the front again, so car was stopped he was taken out of the car kicking and screaming, hubby walked him home whilst I took the car, the last I saw of them was Munch biting daddy’s arm, then shouting help me help me. 7 minutes after I was home I could hear them coming down the road, Munch was still shouting, still hitting, he was sent straight up to his room.

After 10 minutes I called him down so that we could go to the stay and play session at he children’s centre, we were the only ones there so Munch had a great time playing Connect 4, then football and building a very tall tower with the worker there before we went home.

Things were going swimmingly until it was time for tea, as daddy was off again tonight we had decided to take the opportunity to have a chinese after Munch was in bed. I sat at the table whilst Munch was having his dinner, he did no have a civil word to say, he was talking aggressively, kept making very babyish crying noises and was generally being rude, he had a warning and when he did not stop was told  to go and sit on the step, he refused and said he wanted to eat his tea, I was having none of it and was firm and told him step, he then flew at me punching really hard, I told him to go upstairs as I would not be hit, he protested a little, but i think that he realised that he had well overstepped the mark so went up, I called him down after his 7 minutes and he finished his dinner.

I went on the computer for a short while then went to do his bath, all hell broke out when I was upstairs, so I had to come down and sort both of them out, all over 2 sweets!!!

Munch had his bath, daddy did his hair and dried and got him ready for bed, then Munch ran from his room into the spare room and as he did he caught his foot on the meal bit of the Hoover and cut his foot, he was crying and he his foot was bleeding a fair bit, he actually let me hold onto his foot tightly with a towel round it to stop the bleeding, daddy sat next to him and held him, afterwards he took comfort from both of us, daddy carried him downstairs, and I was able to cuddle him on the sofa, such a difference from him not letting us anywhere near him when he has hurt himself before.

Rest of evening went by without a hitch and one happy and content boy is asleep in his bed right now.

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Day 2 of Mummy Gets Tough

The morning started well, we got up a bit later than normal as because of consequence which were put in place because of Munch’s behaviour the morning before. I will point out that these were before the play therapist had been and I started our almost supper-nanny like regime, I had said that is what was going to happen and as Munch remembers everything I needed to follow them through. So breakfast at the table no TV, that had been for jumping on daddy the previous morning, dressed over shop to buy crisps for film club this evening, car, school, easy.

As Munch had film club I did not have to pick him up until 4.45pm, bliss. Once in the car Munch said about making a lead for his little dog which we said that we would do together, I had not been able to get out to get the ribbon to make it and said so and that if I went out the next day I would see if I could get it, que Munch shouting at me aggressively and saying tha I had lied, I did the that is a very rude voice, that is not allowed, firmly and he was told to hang up his coat hen step as soon as he got in.

Once we got in that’s what he did, once finished he practiced his reading for assemble the following day and did his homework which I am pleased to say he is now putting a bit of effort into as before he never wanted to do it and it would be very rushed. Munch’s writing is very untidy, and his spelling is terrible, so I am thinking of doing some work on that myself at home with him once or twice a week. I shall keep up our regime and once he is getting into a better state of mind around his control issues I will start.

As he did not have long until  bath time Munch was allowed to use the computer until his dinner was ready, he had one more episode of rude talking and time out, then dinner, bath, straight to supper with no TV tonight, another of his consequences from the previous morning. Munch has got into a very bad habit of not brushing his teeth properly, so I am trying to encourage him, tonight he was repeatedly asked to brush them properly, and continued not to, so he lost the next mornings TV again.

We ead a story that the PT had lent us about a cross crocodile who was in pain and how a little mouse came and took away his pain and held it for him then buried it, I altered the wording a little to reflect the pain that Munch carries around with him and how we help to take it away, but using the character’s in the story, Munch really cuddled up to me whilst I was reading it which he still finds very hard to do so is lovely for me when he does, and he wanted me to sit back on his bed so that he could sit on me and have a cuddle afterwards, which is another rare but good when it happens occurence. We did cream water and cuddle, did not quiet manage the kisses tonight, but there’s always tomorrow. Munch called down a few times afterwards, then eventually sleep.

In addition to above, I spoke to both our SW and Munch’s SW today, we are worried about the fact that we only have 3 more sessions with the play therapist and we feel that we need more, if only for support for us. Munch’s SW has said tha he will try to speak to he PT so that he is able to go back to their funding panel for more funding, so fingers crossed.

2 Very Different Days

Yesterday morning for some reason Munch came and woke me up at 6.40am, I told him to go back to bed which he did and put his TV on, he must have come in another 4 times and in the end we got up earlier than planned. Munch is normally good at staying in his room until 9am on a weekend so I am not sure what was a matter this morning.

Munch was 1 of the 4 Beaver’s representing his group in a Connect 4 competition in the morning so we got ready for that, he was his usual apprehensive self when going somewhere new, saying that he did not want to go. I knew that he would be fine once he got there so gave him lots of encouragement, and he was ok and off with the other Beaver’s from his group as soon as we arrived.

I was back a couple of hour’s later to pick him up and watch the presentation of certificates, Munch go a taking part certificate of which he was really pleased with.

After we went straight to our local shopping centre because Munch has completely out grown his old winter coat and he needed one. Munch was in a very funny mood by the time we got there he was cranky, very un-cooperative, he had pocket-money he wanted to spend, he had his Kevin and Perry head on, so he was full of attitude and generally not listening and thinking he was being very clever, he had several warnings. We went o the toilet and he insisted on coming in with me and did not want o leave and stand on his own, I told him that the mood he was in I did not trust him not to open the door, he promised that he would not, and then did. I told him that he had enough warning’s and that we were going home. He did his usual and said that he had forgotten not to open the door it was an accident, which it was not. I just took hold of his hand and walked through the shopping centre with him protesting until we got to the car park. I was really aware of the fact that I desperately needed to get him a coat, so I took him aside when we got to the car park and talked to him and said that we would go back, but here would be no more warnings, if he stepped out of line just once, we would go home, coat or no coat, and if he had no coat we could not go to the Fireworks display  we were going to tha evening.

The rest of the shopping trip passed very sullenly, we got a coat, as he behaved we went to Disney and he spent his pocket-money on Club Penguin books and we made it home in one piece.

Munch’s attitude carried on at home, he clearly was not having a good day and was struggling. We had tea and got ready for the Fireworks Display, we were meeting friends. Whilst there Munch was trying to be very controlling of everything, nothing was right, he was very heavy-handed with our friends daughter. He moaned and groaned although the fireworks, the later night and very early morning was obviously kicking in, walking out he was deliberately bumping into people as it was very crowded, we walked a little way to get a bus, all the bus’ passing were full, we managed to get a taxi in the end, this cheered him up and we had a much better mood.

When we got in daddy had to go to nanny’s, we had a very nice supper time then off to bed. Munch walked out of the kitchen then just walked back in and punched me out of the blue, and started shouting that I had left his new coat on the back of the chair. Now I am not proud of the fact, but at this point I have to say I completely lost the plot, I was so angry, I shouted and shouted, I told him I was sick and tired of his attitude, tha I was not going to be hit and kicked by him anymore, that was not what son’s did to their mummy’s and if he carried on that from now on he could stay upstairs in his bedroom where I did not have to see him, me shouting like a fish wife gave him even more ammunition to shout back and swear at me like a trooper. I was just so angry that I yelled and yelled about what I don’t know.

I came downstairs and sat down and could not believe how I had acted, so after a few minutes, I went back up and apologised to him, it is the first time in the 10 months that he has been our son I have ever seen his face wet with tears, I said I was very sorry that I shouted at him, we had a hug and a kiss and off to sleep he went.

On reflection we should not really have taken Munch to he display, what we have said is that in future if we are planning on doing something like that we will leave it until the last-minute to tell him the we can judge before we go if we feel that he will be able to cope with it.

Today has been totally different, he got up in a much better frame of mind. After breakfast I decided to take Munch to the local Sunday market, we spent a couple of hours there. Munch bought a little yappy dog. We called in the supermarket on he way home, had an hour indoor’s then went and met one of my friend’s and her dog with our dog. Munch had a good couple of hours walking and running with the two dog’s.

Back at home he watched TV before bath his evening TV and yet more fireworks, supper, bed story. Tonight he wanted to do his bottle again sitting on my knee. In all the a very good day.

And Another Good One!!

We had a visit during the night as Munch had a nose bleed. I moped him up and took  him back to his bed with a toilet roll and we did not hear another peep until he knocked on the door and came into our bedroom armed with his clock to show us that it was 9am.

Munch and daddy got up and left me in bed for a nice lay in. I could hear them laughing and playing downstairs. Munch came up every now and again to tell me what was happening. A little later they got themselves ready and off they went swimming whilst i had a nice couple of hours peace and quiet.

When they got back Munch came in and gave me the biggest hug, that was such a big break through for our little man and even know a good few hours later I find myself grinning about it. We all watched a bit of TV, Munch used the computer, then it was time for dinner.

After that normal evening routine, bath, TV, supper, teeth, bed, we had a little incident whilst getting into bed where he pushed me. This has happened several times lately, so I had words with him. This started him shouting at me, I put down his book and told him that I  was fed up with being shouted at and if that was how he was going to speak to me, I was not going to stay and left the room. Munch called down that he was sorry and please could he have his story, so I went back up and said on this occasion I would read to him. He listened well and again I had a lovely goodnight hug and lovely kisses.

One glowing mummy signing off…….