19/1 – Arranging Karate Lessons

Today started well, and we had a pleasant morning before school.

Daddy picked Munch up from school and as soon as he came in he was straight upstairs and onto his Harry Potter Lego game on the XBox. Daddy and I had already discussed doing his reading later, after daddy has gone to work, rather than as soon as he gets in, so we will be giving this a trial run to see how it works, anyway problem was solved as he had not brough home his reading diary or his learning diary. I shall be checking his bag before he leaves school tomorrow as this is one of his little ploy’s to get out of doing the work. I would not mind, but it’s not as if we push, as long as he is doing his reading which is what his school expects, with his learning diary, which is a subject that they are given every Friday to do with what they are doing at school, we will talk about it, I will give him any help he asks for and then when he has finished as long as he is happy with what he has done so are we, at the moment I feel we have much more to worry about and be working on than his home work. Some times its 5 minutes and its done, other times he will spend a long tome on it so we will for the time being do as we are doing on the homework front.

When Munch had finished with his Xbox, he asked if we could bake some cakes, which we did, he watched TV whilst they were cooking, then had great fun decorating them when they were finished he proudly gave one each to me and daddy and then had 2 himself (they were very small).

Ever since Munch has been here he has talked about Karate, we have spoken before about him doing it but we were a bit unsure, anyway we decided to phone up a local group, hubby spoke to the leader who said to bring him along and to have a look a bit of a join in, the only thing he said was that the area where we live is a big into football so the youngest they had at the moment was 14 years, double Munch’s, anyway we though we would take him along anyway, we had picked this club because of the time as it was 6.30 -7.30, where the others were all later times.

Off we went leaving 1/2 hour early so we could meet the leader, as it was it took us that whole 1/2 hour to find the place, and then once in the building we had to find them as the receptionist sent us to the ballroom dancing lessons!!! When we finally found them they had already gone in but there was a different club that had just finished and they had lots of littley that were around Munch’s age, we spoke to them and have decided they would be much more suitable and Munch was happier that there were other children there, so we will go back again next week.

Back home Munch had another of his little cakes for supper before heading off for bed.

Another busy Tuesday

Well after Munch went to bed so early and slept at midnight, he came in as happy as Larry saying that he was scared, I took him back to bed he got in and slept till 8am this morning. I had an interesting conversation about this with the Play Therapist this morning, she was saying how emotions are learnt and how he has not learn how to react appropriately to his emotions, i.e being happy when scared, inappropriate laughing just to name a couple.

Anyway up got Munch and our morning went without incident until the Play Therapist arrived, I could hear him being extremely aggressive with her, he was swearing, just being how he has with us over the last couple of weeks. As she said afterwards you cannot just wipe out 5 years of extreme trauma and abuse, and it is going to surface every now and again, that she would be more worried if it did not.

We talked about going back to the basic’s again, re doing all that we did in those 1st 10 week sessions, thing’s like snuggle time that have naturally petered out, back to using sucking as a calming technique, being very firm with our boundaries which is what Munch needs. The trouble is, and we have talked about this before is that when thing’s improve you tend to let down your guard, and you cannot give Munch an inch.

We also talked about his very low self-esteem, about how over the last couple of weeks he has been saying that he is an idiot and hitting himself, I told her how at one point I had just said to Munch that I wasn’t going there today, and that had calmed him a little, she said it was a good way to deal with it as to keep saying, no you’re not ect will just fuel him, and also to use our calming techniques.

Whilst the having his Play Therapy the post arrived along with all our court paper work as the fee has now gone up and the paper work we had received still had the old fee on it!!!! So back to the post office again, with paper work and a cheque for the correct fee this time.

Ok, so Munch has been in 10 minutes, he has already sworn, so had swearing is not allowed – step, for which I got a slap so he is now upstairs in his room where he has been sent for the next 15 minutes. When time was up Munch stayed upstairs playing.

We had tea then off for his 1st gymnastic’s session at school, when we got back from that Munch wanted to play his Xbox game he had been playing earlier, so off upstairs he went until Beavers. Tonight when we got to Beavers he really did not want to go in, he was pushing me and say he didn’t want to go, even when we got in there he was saying please can we go home, which is very unlike him, he always say’s he doesn’t want to go on Beaver’s night as he does with anything because he lack confidence, but normal there is no fuss and as soon as we get to the gate he is off playing with the others. He was fine when I picked him up and had enjoyed himself.

Back indoor’s the bedtime routine went well, I tried to put some fun into it and we had a laugh, then for a reason only known to Munch he put his woggle down the toilet, was extremely babyish around getting undressed and then threw a little hard ball at me which hit me on the neck and hurt, so he lost 1/2 hour off his bedtime tomorrow. A hug and kiss and he is now quiet upstairs.

Bank Holiday Tuesday

Munch came into us at 8.30 to ask if he could put his Xbox on, we then went down at 9am. this morning has been good, we had one visit to the step for not listening, and Munch is now upstairs quietly playing with his Lego, so I have made the most of coffee and computer time.

We had a trip out today, as Munch has been so well-behaved over Christmas daddy said that Munch could choose between either another controller or a game for his Xbox, so we went off to Smyths Toys, the Xbox controller was £40, we looked at the Xbox games all the one’s Munch wanted were to old for him, he started to get a bit stroppy, and then shouted at me that I was not letting him buy anything, he know’s very well that he cannot have games that are to old for him and I was not going to be shouted at, so I told him that we had to leave the shop, he begged and pleaded, with me all the way back to the car that it was an accident and he didn’t mean to talk to me like that, he was sorry, he woudn’t do it again, you know the same old thing that all parents hear a hundred times. I just said that he was not allowed to talk to me like that and to get into the car.

We made our way to Tesco’s, in the car I told him that we would look to see if they had what he wanted there, but one step out of line and that would be it, nothing, this kept him in line, and he behaved well, a bit lively and gave a few of the other shoppers a smile on there faces with his extremely loud sing about how he loved his mummy and wants to kiss and hug her!!!!

We got his Xbox controller for £25, what a difference in price, I was gad I  had not got it in Smyths, £15 is a big difference and how do the justify that amount.

We went to the cafe to have a bite to eat before coming home, tried to set up the extra controller on the Xbox, but could not do it and Munch is on the sofa watching E.T. as I type this, before looking up how to do his controller.

Well Munch lasted about 1/2 way through E.T. before getting board, he was quiet though until dinner as he was sticking his Harry Potter stickers into their album.

After dinner we had  a couple of games of Junior Monopoly and a game of Catch Me if You Can before TV, daddy came in just after so we had another game of Junior Monopoly before bed. Daddy offered to do bedtime as I have had the most dreadful cough for the last few day’s and it is making me feel awful.

I have already been upstairs once, Munch play’s daddy up something rotten when daddy does bedtime, I have just come down again after going up there and telling daddy to stop his story as he was talking all the way through it!!! Thinking, need to get daddy to do bedtime more often.

Nanny Visited Today

Well I managed to have a lay in today until 9.45, Munch was so busy playing his Xbox in his bedroom, he came in a couple of times to say that he had moved up a level and went back and carried on, and as it was Bank Holiday Monday I made the most of it.

When we came downstairs we had breakfast, Munch played with some of his new toys for a while, then been as Nanny was coming to visit this afternoon and I needed to get on I asked him to go and do his hour upstairs, off he went, after a while he came down and got his Spy Kids film’s and we helped him set it up on his Xbox even though his TV has a DVD player on it, Munch was as pleased as punch and watched all of the film before coming down, so I had a nice 2 hours to get on with some much-needed housework.

Just before Nanny came I asked Munch to remember to say thank-you for his huge Remote Control Truck and the money that she had given him for Christmas, he asked if I would say it for him, “tell her I asked you to say thank-you for me” he said. As soon as she came in he said it himself though, which I was very pleased with him for. Munch can be very shy on time’s, and then on other’s over familiar when he doesn’t know people, something else we have been working on.

Munch was an absolute star whilst Nanny was here, we had lunch, he was kind and polite to her, he showed her things that he had got for Christmas and went and watched The Incredibles so that Nanny coud have a break, Munch is her 1st grandchild at 91 years of age that is not bad going!!!

When the film had finished Munch wanted to play 1 of his games with Nanny and could not quite understand why Nanny would not be able to play, in the end he sat with me and daddy on the sofa, and we just sat and were very silly, tickling, smelling smelly feet, just having fun, and he laughed and laughed.

After that we had tea, which because of the time was tea and supper for Munch, he gave Nanny a nice hug before going to bed.

When we got upstairs Munch said that he had laughed a lot today and that we should call him laugh-a-lot. Into bed and I read him his Spiderman Book that his other Granny had got him for Christmas, which was about him having won a competition to New York to take photo’s of Spiderman, it included his name and his cousin’s name and also where we lived. His face was a picture, he though Granny had written the story herself just for him, and said look at the pictures isn’t Granny a good drawer, bless.

Well I don’t want to jinks us by saying this, but Christmas has surpassed all our expectation’s, we were expecting Munch to struggle, badly, we thought that we would have a few meltdown  and we have had none, there was the one tiny little incident last night before bed, I can live with that, oh how I love that boy of mine.